Can You Be a Feminist and Still Be a Submissive? [BDSM Discussion]

Hi My Friends!

Today we are diving into the topic of feminism and how it impacts a submissive in the BDSM community. Since the 2016 elections, there has been a resurgence of women’s rights in the media and in the streets. Women have donned pink from head to toe protesting against the current administration and the President’s treatment of women. As someone in a full-time D/s relationship, I began pondering feminism and how it impacts someone like me who voluntarily submits to their dominant.

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On a more personal note, I come from a long line of feminists. My own mother actively protests for women’s rights and has bumper stickers from every march she has ever done. But me? Well, I’m a bit more shy. 🙂 But I digress. Often times when we think of feminism we associate the word directly with women and their fight for equal right’s and treatment. In reality, the very definition of the word is:

Feminism: the theory of the political, economical, and social equality of the sexes (Source: Merriam-Webster Dictionary)

Feminism, or being a feminist has been used as a term associated with women’s rights, but in truth, the core values of feminism is equality for both sexes. Now that is something I definitely support. It is important to remember that submission has a bad connotation in the vanilla world, because people outside of our community don’t understand that it is voluntary submission unto the dominant. We choose to serve our mommy or daddy. We choose to perform tasks for them and heed their commands in the exchange of power. However, just because we are submissives does not mean that we are doormats!

In a healthy, balanced D/s relationship the dominant needs the submissive just as much as the submissive needs their dominant. There is a fluid exchange of power, back and forth, that keeps the dom yearning for more from their sub and the sub craving one more touch… one more task… from their dom. Gender aside, in a true D/s relationship the dominant is ultra-protective over their submissive and wouldn’t let anyone harm their little one. Whether you’re mommy/daddy, master/mistress, little girl, or little boy, the relationship is one of complete consent, trust, and understanding. There is an equal balance in the power exchange that keeps both adults safe and protected. The BDSM community absolutely supports gender equality.

History has shown the struggles that women have faced trying to gain status in the workplace or equal pay on par with men. These societal issues still persist today. However, caution must be used when associating feminism to submission because in the D/s relationship, both adults agree to whatever occurs within their relationship. The submissive has equal power to put their hard limits, soft limits, and special needs into the contract for the dominant to adhere to. I guess what I’m trying to say is… yes. You CAN be a feminist and a submissive at the same time. I am all for equality of both sexes. I also love and crave serving my Daddy. I have an insatiable need to serve him with all of me, body, mind, and soul. I also know that he cares for me with everything he is.

I think it’s fantastic that women and society are pushing forward for equal rights and equal pay. I think it’s necessary for women to band together to bring light to cases of rape and unwanted molestation. In the BDSM community we stress safety and consent above all else! It doesn’t matter who you are, what you identify as, what your relationship dynamic is, etc. If you don’t have consent, then you don’t touch! Period. I know this post was short and sweet, but I just felt compelled to write it this morning. Stay tuned for more tomorrow and until then, have a wonderful day everyone!

~Penny Xx

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