Christmas Reflections… [Kitten’s Ramblings]

Merry Christmas, Friends!

Today I thought I would sit here and write a reflection post. The end of the year always makes us reflect, doesn’t it? Are you like that? I’m always that girl around New Year’s, who sits there mulling over what resolutions I want to do in the coming year. I analyze my behavior, cut out things that aren’t working in my life, etc. In short, December and January is always a transitional time in my mind. This year is no different. I’ve come a long way being a Little. It has only been a few short months since I began this blog and started exposing my Little side to the world. It was a giant step to take.

I had so much fear showing this part of myself publicly. Many times people fear, or criticize things they don’t understand. They see an adult talking with soft, baby babble and stare perplexed. But in truth, before we judge or criticize another, it’s imperative to understand what the person is going through. This morning I walked along the beach to feed the seagulls. I don’t have any pets, so every Christmas morning I feed the local seagulls, ravens, or pigeons. They didn’t mind one bit. As I stood in my denim overalls, with a discreet Christmas-themed onesie beneath, I felt proud of myself. I was “out” in the world as a Little.

If I’m being totally honest, being a Little is only a part of who I am. It’s an important part, don’t get me wrong, but it isn’t all of who I am. I don’t walk around in onesies constantly, nor do I use baby babble all the time. (That would cause a bit of confusion wouldn’t it? lol). Being a Little is a thread in the fabric of my soul. It’s the happiest, most joyful, and playful parts of me that come shining out for the world to see. It is the silly side of myself that is usually repressed by the rational, structured, organized “Big Me” that is always on point. In my day to day life, I am always on the go. I thrive on post-it notes, schedules, and to-do lists. But as a Little, I get to push all that aside for a short time to relax and let that inner child dance and shine. I get to be me.

I was afraid of putting myself out there on a blog, and on Instagram. I was afraid of haters judging my looks in a onesie, or being bullied for not being thin enough or girly-looking enough. But then… I put myself out there. I took one giant step forward outside of my comfort box, and found that there are a lot of nice people in the world. That while I am growing my hair out… and while I am still losing weight…. that people accept me as I am right now. And that’s nice. 🙂 I can be Little and just be me. ❤

So as I turn my gaze towards 2019 there are a few things that I plan to tackle:

  • Publish a 2nd book! (I’m already in the process of writing it, so stay tuned!)
  • Post more pictures of me on the blog, as well as vlog more and publish the videos to my Youtube channel
  • Lose weight and play with my appearance until I get the look that I’m striving for.
  • Write more reflection posts on here. Informational articles are great and important, but this site is also a place for my innermost thoughts too. So I’ll make that a priority.
  • Release the stress and expectation of gaining more followers on Instagram. (This is a big one). I just have to remember my new manta: keep putting out content that I’m passionate about, and the people will come. ❤

I hope you all had a beautiful Christmas with your family. I hope you ate food until your tummies were stuffed and you grinned from ear to ear. I hope you laughed until tears filled your eyes. And I hope you dream blissful dreams tonight. Stay tuned for the next post, and as always, keep on smiling! 🙂

~Penny Xx

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