Days 8 & 9: Design a Time Out Mat & Have a Photo Date at the Playground [100 Days of Dom-Sub Bonding]

Hi My Friends!

I’m back from a couple days of relaxation time. It’s a funny thing when you’re working hard, writing constantly, etc. how “burn out” can sneak up on you. In the last post I was ranting about how I just couldn’t be little. In that moment, I was feeling so consumed with the adult side of my life, that I didn’t have it in me to be Little. After taking a couple of steps back to just relax, unwind, and have some fun, I was able to refocus and find “Little Me” again. So, here I am! And we’re back with days 8 and 9 of the dom-sub bonding exercises.

=== Day 8 ===

The first exercise is to design a time out mat. Now, on here I have spoken about gentle domination and compassionate communication many times when referring to our preferred domination and submission style. For my Daddy and I, we prefer to have a quiet, calming, very respectful dialogue when speaking with each other. Even when we disagree, we use Dr. Marshall Rosenberg’s “Compassionate Communication” approach as the basis of how we converse with each other. That said, because we use healthy communication daily, it is rare that I need to be punished. However, every now and then I will break a rule or I might be in a bit of a mood, and I’ll slip up and get a bit snarky. When that happens, my Daddy will give me a “time out” to cool down.


There are some Littles who are also masochists. I have a good friend who even identifies with her masochist side more so than her Little side. So it really is dependent on the individual if spanking or implements will be beneficial, or if an alternative method such as “time out” is more appropriate. The goal for punishment and discipline is to correct behavior in a gentle, loving manner that still allows the dominant to retain control. For me, I don’t like being hit beyond spanking or a riding crop. (I’m kind of a wimp to physical pain). So my Daddy and I gravitate towards a time out mat. Now, if the thought of getting crafty makes you cringe, there is an excellent (and inexpensive!) “Thought Spot” with a digital timer for purchase on Amazon for $21 USD. I just love the “Thought Spot” because it can recenter your Little when they are grumpy without using corporal punishment for correction.

If you do enjoy arts and crafts, grab an old pillowcase and some markers and design your own “Thought Spot”! You can call the time out spot whatever you’d like and make it your own.

=== Day 9 ===

The second exercise is to head to your local playground and have a date! When was the last time you went on a swing at the park? There is a tiny, little playground tucked away on a walking trail near where I live. Not several nights ago, Daddy and I were walking together when all of a sudden he said, “would you like me to push you on the swings?”. That’s all it took for me to grin and fall into Little Space. I squealed with delight as I flew up in the air, swinging and feeling Little again.

Grab your phone or camera as you set out to the playground with your Little and take photos of the moment. Here are a few snapshot ideas:

  • Take a photo of them sliding down a slide
  • Take a photo of them on a swing (or maybe a video of them swinging in first person view!)
  • Take a photo of them waving to you from a climbing bridge
  • Snap a shot of them swinging across the monkey bars
  • Smile and snap a photo of your Little on the see-saw or the springing rocking horse

You get the idea. But get out there and take some photos of you two just being Cg/l in the moment. If you’re worried about people seeing you, or feeling self-conscious, try going on an off hour. (Think dinner time on a weekday).

Alright, that’s it from me for today, my friends. Stay tuned for more posts, have a wonderful rest of the day, and as always, keep on smiling! 🙂

~Penny Xx

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