Let’s Talk About Sex, Baby (Part 9): Age Play For Beginners, a Sexual Exercise [10-Part Series]

Good Morning Friends!

Happy Friday! I hope you all are having a relaxing day, and are excited for the coming weekend. Today we are diving into part 9 of the “Let’s Talk About Sex, Baby” series. (Does anyone else hum that tune in your head when you read the title? I know I do). Anyway, today’s topic is all about age play. For those new to my blog, welcome! I’m so glad you’re here. Age play is a term that is often misunderstood. So, I’d like to clarify it right from the beginning.

Age play: role-playing between two adult partners in which one person treats the other a different age.

That’s what age play technically is. Now, how people engage in age play can be dramatically different. There are kinksters who use age play for sexual purposes strictly in the bedroom. There are people who engage in role play with or without a full-blown Cg/l relationship involved. For today’s article, we are going to examine age play from a sexual standpoint and how two partners can come together consensually, to create a pleasurable experience using age play as the basis of play.

I. Communication and Consent: 

I will preach about the “4 Steps to a Healthy Play Session” until I’m blue in the face, because that’s how important it is. That said, the very first step to creating a meaningful, play session is to talk about it with your partner before you play together. This is especially crucial if you’ve never engaged in age play before. You’ll want to know:

  • Have they ever experienced sexual age play before?
  • To what age do they usually feel comfortable regressing to?
  • What are their sexual limitations? Soft limits? Hard limits?
  • Are there any specific fantasies within a sexual Little Space that they desire to experience with you?
  • Does either party wish to incorporate discipline (sadism/masochism) into the play scene?
  • Is there a specific taboo fantasy role play scene that either partner desires to have? (Teacher/student, doctor/patient, boss/secretary, etc.)

This stage is all about having those intense discussions (out of Little Space) to find out what your needs and desires are. Don’t be afraid of sharing taboo fantasies. Yes, it can be intimidating to dive deep and disclose your innermost desires, but the more transparent you are with your dominant, the better they are able to lead you. Lastly, agree (i.e. mutual consent!) on what the play scene will be specifically. Then stick to those boundaries! Remember, every age play scene is two adults coming together consensually to engage in play with each other.

II. Play: 

Helping your Little get into the head-space during sex can be tricky. Technically you’re engaging in an adult act, as two adults, yet there is a desire to enter Little Space. This is where the dominant needs to shine. Just like a guided meditation tape, use a soothing voice to guide your Little into the mindset during foreplay. Love on them as you describe what you see in them. Give them gentle kisses, and ask them how old they are. Your Little will likely slip into their little space voice and respond with how old they are. If they do, then you’re already on your way. If they are still having trouble with getting into the mindset, try painting a picture in their mind with your voice. Have them close their eyes, as you look at them, and describe how you see them as a Little. For example:

You can have them close their eyes. Then, tell them, “You are the most beautiful, little girl in the whole world. I love how your pigtails are so soft. How your skin is so silky, and smooth. You’re so innocent and pure. I love how your body is so tiny and made just for me. You’re (daddy/mommy)’s special girl, aren’t you?”.

Remember: it doesn’t matter what their actual adult physical body looks like. Little Space is a head-space. You embody whatever age you regress to, and so in your mind’s eye you can act out that part. You can make your Little feel sexy simply by saying they are gorgeous in your eyes. Navigate the moment together as you become intimate and sexual. Feel your way through it as you stay in your Daddy/Mommy head-space and they stay in Little Space.

If your Little is having difficulty getting into the moment, don’t force it. But, if they want to be intimate but aren’t sure how to slip into little space, I suggest by asking them, “how old are you?”. As you’re painting a “picture with words” (as described above), begin with asking them if they are a young teenager. It’s easier to begin with being a Middle in your mind and working backwards. Once they establish the visual of themselves as a young teen in their mind, you can ask, “Can you see yourself as… a 12 year old?… an 8 year old?” and so on. You will slowly work down to their usual age regression until they have reached Little Space and feel at peace with their baseline. Always work within the boundaries that your Little feels comfortable! I cannot stress this enough.

III. Aftercare: 

Never forget to do aftercare! “Sub drop” is a real thing, my friends. Sub drop occurs when a submissive has engaged in a play session, but doesn’t receive aftercare after the scene has ended. So they experience the high, endorphin rush… and then their mood and emotions come crashing down right afterward because the dominant didn’t gently guide them back into a mental place of comfort and safety. It’s usually from lack of experience that this happens. After an age play scene it is critical that you (the dominant) navigate your Little, by talking to them gently, to get them into a place of mental peace.

Physical touch is so important in aftercare, especially after sex. Hold your Little One. Reassure them how much you love them. Thank them for their service to you, and for giving you the gift of their body, because it is truly the most precious gift that one can give. Ease them back into a space of happy, Little Space, or into a relaxed, “Big Me” space (whichever they prefer). But just be there for them completely.

IV. Discussion and Debriefing: 

The last step in any play session is to talk about it afterwards. Many couples forget to take time to debrief and discuss the play scene. Find a quiet time soon after the scene has ended where you can focus on the following:

  • What worked in the play scene that aroused you both deeply?
  • What didn’t work that could be modified in the future?
  • Was the scene something you both would like to repeat again?
  • Is there a different type of age play scene that you’d like to try for next time?
  • Was the aftercare sufficient and fulfilling for you both?
  • Were you both completely comfortable during play? If not, how can things be changed so that there is 100% comfort for next time?

Listen attentively to each other. Be honest and frank in your responses to these questions. Take feedback from your partner and make note on how to improve, or build upon what you’ve created together. Work hard on this, and I know you won’t go wrong. 🙂

I hope you all have a beautiful weekend. That’s it from me on this post. Stay tuned for the next one, and as always, keep on smiling! 🙂

~Penny Xx

 

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