Today I began a new diet, which is just a nice way to say that I’m starving and feel out of sorts. So I’m going to give you my apologies in advance if this post isn’t as lengthy and of “top quality” as I usually produce. I’m currently dreaming of carbs. That said, today I want to discuss motivations for going into little space. As I’ve stated in previous posts, the reasons that someone becomes a Little are numerous and as varied as each Little is. However, today I’d like to look at three major reasons that many littles regress in age and go into little space:
I. When a Little Has Mental Health Issues:
As someone who comes from a dysfunctional family, I always feel a pang of guilt when I’m in a conversation, and the topic of family comes up. Common questions such as: “Are you close to your mom or dad?” or “Do you have any siblings?” is so easy to answer for many, but for me (and many others out there), the question weighs heavy on our heart. The answer makes us stammer and we might begin to blush. “Well no…” I say with great hesitation, “I mean, I do have siblings, but we never talk. It’s not that we dislike each other per say–” I ramble and begin to fidget, “But when my parents got divorced at age 10 because my dad cheated on my mom….”. I find myself gushing a recap of 20 years of old baggage. Such a story unearths a few of the many reasons that I slip into Little Space.
For many littles like myself, regressing in age heals old wounds. It nurtures the developmental parts of the brain that got overlooked or underdeveloped. In the care of a healthy dominant, a little can ease themselves from anxiety or depression. They can gain mental release from family stress or other outside forces that cause them pain. When you’re in little space, you suspend your imagination. You regress to a mental age that feels comfortable, light, happy, and free. A 5 year old doesn’t have to worry about kids, bills, the mortgage, and panic attacks. Instead, the little can snuggle up with their favorite toys (especially ones that are very tactile) to calm their nerves and lift their spirits. They can just let go and simply be.
Another aspect within mental health and little space that I’d like to touch upon is child abuse and how it impacts the mind on a long-term basis. Many littles have been labeled as people with “daddy issues”. While this is true for some, I personally hate it when people use such a label. It undermines the ongoing pain that many littles have experienced by suffering from abuse, neglect, or other childhood violence. Domestic violence is a major problem in so many homes. The reasons for abuse are varied, but many littles come into the community with scars from being hurt by family members long ago. They seek out a little space because their own childhood was destroyed by a person they trusted. While little space should never be a complete substitute for seeking out a mental health professional/therapy, it can be a great tool to help ease your mind and allow you to experience positive, fun things that you wanted to do when you were a child.
II. When a Little Craves Attention:
I’ve always found it fascinating how humans cope with emotion. We are incredibly intelligent beings that have found ways to navigate through our insecurities. So, too, do many Littles turn to the online Cg/l community and social media to fulfill their need for attention. They view the lifestyle as a kink, and in doing so, dive into a more sexual aspect of being Little. They might show off images of their body on Instagram, or dive into chat rooms to seek the attention of many dominants. I recently learned the term “Tinder Daddy” to describe dominants who hop on Tinder solely for the purpose of hooking up with Littles looking for a quick fling. While I don’t condone this type of behavior (as it is the exact opposite of a true D/s relationship), I do understand why people do it.
We all want to be loved. As humans we seek out connections for love, friendship, warmth, and empathy. We were never meant to live life completely and utterly alone. Studies have shown time and time again that having social networks actually promotes a greater overall health and increases longevity. So, if you do see a Little who is using their little space as a kink, be kind. Understand where their desire to behave like that comes from. Respect your differences and move on. Live and let live. ❤
III. When a Little is Non-Sexual:
I want to wrap up this post by reminding everyone that there are littles whose motivation for going into little space may be completely non-sexual and that, of course, is just fine. There are many littles out there who get great enjoyment, release, etc. from little space but feel most comfortable when their little space is like that of a true child. It isn’t intended to be sexual in any way, shape, or form. They regress for the pure innocence and beauty of childhood. The world becomes magical and light again. A non-sexual little space is often the case (and highly encouraged) when a little is underage. Please be aware that if you do intend to have a non-sexual little space, but wish to connect with a dominant, to tell them up front when you first meet that you are a non-sexual little. This will help your dominant gauge their behavior and how they treat you.
I know this post was short and sweet, but I hope you found something helpful to gain from it. Stay tuned for the next topic, have a wonder Sunday, my friends. And as always, keep on smiling! 🙂