Day 29 of Little Introspection: Is There a Type of Dom You Are Attracted To?

Hi Friends!

Happy Hump Day! We’re halfway through the week, and I’m so excited for father’s (daddy’s) day this weekend! Do you all have any special plans for Sunday? Around here, I’ll be cooking up Daddy’s favorite dishes all day while we snuggle up and relax. Food is love in this house. 🙂 Today we are discussing styles of domination and what my personal preference is. So, let’s dive in!

I. The Master Style: 

The first style of dominant that I’d like to talk about is a Master. Masters can identify in an M/s (Master/slave) relationship, or a D/s relationship. They often go by names that denote a higher protocol of respect, such as: Master, Lord, Sir, etc. This style of domination tends to lean more on the more “hardcore” forms of submission that incorporate corporal punishment for the submissive if an infraction has occurred. There are higher standards of rules and protocol that the submissive has to adhere to, and the Master (while highly protective of their submissive) keeps a certain decorum in all interactions. Unlike a caregiver, a Master holds their domination by using all interactions with their submissive in a strict, orderly fashion. The submissive in this type of relationship thrives on pleasing their Master. They accept their punishments with grace and endure the spankings or whippings that they receive.

While I do have a deep need to serve my Daddy, and anyone else that my Daddy instructs me to do so, in my personal experiences, Masters can be emotionally reserved. I’ve come close to two Masters in the past, and both have been succinct and “to the point” in their interactions with me. This isn’t good or bad. But as someone who naturally is warm, bubbly, high energy, and affectionate, I struggle with people who don’t open up easily. I love to get to know people, and the Masters that I’ve encountered just don’t talk much. So while I deeply respect all of the dominants and submissives out there who have M/s style relationships, this form of domination just isn’t for me.

II. The Caregiver Style: 

This style of domination refers exclusively to the Cg/l branch within BDSM. A caregiver can be male or female. And while many assume that a caregiver is a mommy or a daddy (and likely that it is), there are also dominants and switches who assume the roles of: babysitters, aunts, uncles, big sisters, and big brothers, and step in to care for a little as well. A caregiver usually has a certain set of personality traits, including but not limited to: lots of patience, warmth and compassion, a desire to care for their submissive, a love of pampering their partner, a good sense of humor, someone who gravitates towards optimism, and someone who is extremely loyal and understanding of their Little’s needs.

Obviously, Daddy and I are Cg/l so the bulk of my experience has been with a caregiver. However, having been in an M/s relationship before and now a Cg/l relationship, I much prefer having a caregiver over a master, because it better fits my personality.

III. Hard and Soft Dominants: 

Now, I’d like to note here that just because a dominant is a caregiver doesn’t mean their style of domination is soft. There are caregivers who maintain strict rules and protocol with their Littles. There are also dominants who feel more comfortable loving, pampering, and nurturing their Little versus disciplining. These are affectionately known as “soft doms”. Neither style of being a “hard dom” or “soft dom” is right or wrong. Each dominant must find the style that works for them. But equally as important, is the need for a submissive to know what style of domination works best for them!

Daddy and I have a “soft dom” Cg/l relationship. I’ll be honest here. For a while I struggled with Daddy being tender, warm, and not into disciplining. I wanted him to get more strict with me, to help me reach my goals. But, after tons of reflection and discussions together, I realized that I much prefer having him loving, protective, and loyal to me rather than being emotionally distant, strict, and firm. Find what style works for you. If you’re a solo Little looking for a dominant, now is the best time to take time for self-reflection so you know what type of mate to look for.

So, how about YOU? What type of dominant are you attracted to? I hope you all have wonderful Wednesday! Sending you so much love. Stay tuned for the next post, and I’ll see you all back here tonight!

Much love,

~Kitten xx

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