Day 30 of Little Introspection: Would You Ever Bond With an Older Dom (5+ Yrs Older)?

Hi Friends!

It is amazing to me how a good night’s rest can restore the mind, and make us bounce back with hope and optimism. I’m feeling much stronger today. That said, I’m excited to dive into today’s topic: age! Ageism can be an issue in the Cg/l community, because there are so many dominants and submissives who are in their early 20’s (or younger!). There is a stereotype that all dominants are young, 20-something men and women who are “primed and ready” to lead. Likewise, there is a huge misconception that all Littles are fresh-faced, 18 year olds who are looking to be loved and pampered on.


These rumors and speculations can be very damaging to dominants and submissives who are older and experienced in our community. I can attest that there are many, wonderful, incredible dominants out there who are older and can lead with a firm and wise hand. As someone in her early 30’s, there are many advantages to being with an older dominant or an older submissive. So, today I’d like to expand upon a previous post where I listed the advantages of being with an older dominant. I hope you all enjoy! Now, let’s dive in:

I. Age Can Give Maturity and Wisdom That Is Special:ย 

Now, I’m not saying that every adult out there is mature. Lord knows that there are many adults who need a remedial course in how to be understanding and cope with life. But, generally speaking, when you connect with someone older, they can give advice and wisdom that is sound and healthy. This is especially important if the bond you seek is that between a dominant and submissive. You want to connect with a dominant who has enough life experience to lead you into healthy choices. You’ll want someone who can give you advice with a grain of wisdom, from their own personal experiences. This can range from personal finances, to how they treat others, and where their priorities lie.

I once connected (in a vanilla relationship) with a man who was 12 years older than I was. I was 23 and he was 34. We had a wonderful connection for over a year that allowed us to share different perspectives and experiences. At the time, I made him feel super young with my vibrancy and high energy, and he would give me thoughtful feedback as I made decisions in my life. It was a friendship that eventually included romance. While we eventually lost touch, the experience forever taught me that age really is just a number. Look at the person’s heart, because that is where all of the answers will be.

II. Sex with Someone Older Can Be Just as Hot and Wild:ย 

I remember when I was in my early 20’s, I felt nervous wondering if my libido would slowly taper off as I aged. “What if I get old and suddenly don’t want to give a blowjob?” I thought in horror, “I love giving head!”. I chuckle at those thoughts now, because I’m in my 30’s and still going strong. If you’ve ever had sex with someone older, or spoken to someone who has, then you’d know that age really doesn’t define a persons ability to perform in bed. Weight, overall health, hormones, etc. are the things that matter as we age. There are people in their 80’s who are still having sex on the regular! (May we all be so lucky!).

So if you’re pondering connecting with a dominant who is older, but you’re nervous if your sex life will be impacted, don’t be. Shove some pillows under your chest, bend over on all fours, and let them take it from there. As a seasoned dominant, they will certainly know what to do. ๐Ÿ˜‰ Our bodies may age, but our minds do not. We still have fantasies, sexual urges, kinks, and fetishes all throughout our life. Embrace the beauty of aging, and know that sex and sexual expression can be felt and achieved at any age.

III. Older Dom’s Are Sure of Themselves:ย 

As I’ve met many men and women throughout my 34 years on Earth, I’ve heard people say certain insecurities, such as:

  • Does my cock size matter? I’m not White, and our White brethren are much more endowed.
  • Men like big boobs. I should get implants.
  • You couldn’t possibly like me. I’m not white!
  • Real men love ass. Boys like breasts.
  • Tall people look leaner and have better legs.
  • Straight hair looks prettier than curly hair.
  • I have to get “swimsuit ready”.

I’ve had the joy, privilege, and honor of meeting people from every race, religion, all across the globe. And what I can tell you is this, everyone has insecurities. I’ve met people who are incredibly trendy and still they worry about lacking in an area of their life. I’ve snuggled up to a six-pack, and made out with a girl who looked like a red-haired Irish goddess.

The older you get, the more those insecurities begin to quiet down. You really do begin to care less, and embrace yourself more. The older dominant knows this. They know who they are. They accept their strengths and their flaws, and choose partners to bond with who can enhance their life in some way. They know what they bring to the table, and use their strengths to lead. This is the power of the older dominant.

IV. So Would I Bond With an Older Dom?ย 

Absolutely! Age is just a number to me. I judge someone based upon their heart and how they treat others. If my Daddy gives me permission to connect with a dominant for play sessions, and I feel comfortable doing so, then I don’t really care what their age is. So long as they are a legal adult of sound mind and heart, and I feel that we click, then sure! Let’s play! ๐Ÿ™‚

How about you? Would you ever bond with a dominant who was (5+ years) older than you? Would you ever connect with a submissive if she was a bit younger? Comment and let me know! I hope you all have a wonderful Thursday! Stay tuned for the next post, and I’ll see you all back here tonight!

Much love,

~Kitten xx



  1. An interesting question, I think it depends on how much younger the sub is. At almost 45, that can make a big difference in things. Such as relatability and likes/dislikes. Commonalities beyond sexual play, etc.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Older Dominants
    To me are super sexy
    Attracted to that confidents
    Life experiences give
    As well as there skills length of experience in BDSM
    Am 40 easily go up 55
    As long as physical on my level
    If we get along (click)relate, similar humour and communicate I believe applies to any age

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I agree with you, Bittersweet! Age is hardly a factor if both parties are on the same page as far as ability, interests, desires, etc. If the communication is there, then the relationship should flow smoothly ๐Ÿ™‚ Great comment! โค


Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s