After a productive day of writing, I felt the need to cathartically release emotion here. So if you’re in the mood for some more Cg/l topics, I’ll see you back here on the next post. For now, let’s dive in.
My cell phone buzzed as I laid down on the couch this afternoon. Peeling open an eye I peered at the screen and saw a text. “Hmm…” I mumbled and tapped open the screen. There she was in all her glory, checking in on me in her moment of boredom. “Hello mom” I texted back and put my phone face down. “Nap time” I whispered and closed my eyes again. Seconds later my phone rang. With a heavy sigh I didn’t bother peeling my eyes open this time. “Hi mom” I said picking up the line. “Hi honey! You’re NEVER going to believe what I just found out” she gushed immediately. I paused silently and waited for her to finish. She isn’t used to people doing active listening. “HELLO??” she said loudly into the phone wondering if we got cut off. “Ow…” I groaned, “still here, mom”.
“I have news about your father” she said and paused. I could practically feel her smirking on the other end of the line. My father and I have a thrice-annual phone chat and that’s about it. I could feel her wanting me to take the bait. My mother loves a good piece of juicy gossip. “Okay” I said calmly, and waited again. I heard her “tsk” into the phone. “He’s unhappy in his marriage and feels trapped” she blurted out. I sat up and closed my eyes for a moment.
I remembered living in the house with my father. I could feel the Atlanta heat on my skin for a second, and the way good, Southern cooking tastes. I remembered the chirp of cicadas at night, and the smell of pine trees in red, Georgia clay. I remembered the Big Chicken, spanikopita at the diner, and lining up for chicken, egg, and cheese biscuits at dawn. I remembered the way the sun hit the lake on a summer’s day, and the comfort of driving over long, country miles. I remembered rain storms that rocked the sky from early spring to late September. I remembered the twang from every person I knew, and how “hun” was used to indicate everyone from your uncle to your sister. Yes, I’m a Southern girl at heart and spent years in the deep South living in a place far different from my life now. These years molded and shaped me. They left lasting impressions on the beauty of Southern hospitality, and the comfort of having a home. Things that my mother never understood nor wished to remember from their divorce 25 years ago.
“Right speech” I mumbled aloud.
“What?” she said puzzled into the phone. “Right speech” I said again and inhaled, “one part of Buddha’s 8-fold path is using right speech to not hurt other beings. I’m reading about it”. There was a moment of dead air on the line. “Right, well I have to go” she said curtly and hung up before I could answer.
I laid back down and closed my eyes. I choose to put positive vibes out into the universe. If that makes me strange, so be it… ❤ Cheers, friends! 🙂