Good Evening Friends,
I absolutely love making new friends, and I can attest that the many wonderful people that I’ve met through WP are just an incredible group of individuals! You all are AWESOME! Tonight, I want to spotlight a friend of mine who is a Little, a gamer, a friend, and an eclectic soul like myself. Below you’ll find my interview with Kuudere, but before we dive in, they said a sentence about Little Space that literally had me lifting my hands to the sky saying, “Yes!! That’s exactly the way it is!!”. When describing Little Space, they said:
I think of my little self as a mindset or overlay to my adult self. So my little self often bleeds into everyday life activities. – Kuudere
Can we all say, “Yaaaas!!”? Because seriously that is exactly how Little Space is for them, me, and so many other Littles. The way they described Little Space so eloquently completely blew me away. It is the merge of regression into your everyday life. Kuudere is one of those amazing people who isn’t afraid to put it all out there on their blog: Little Expectations! Whether they’re discussing rope work, or kinks they enjoy, what drew me to them is how authentic, real, and brutally honest they are in each and every post. Every time I read their blog I find myself saying, “Yes! I completely agree!!”. It’s just that good.
Are you ready to meet Kuudere? 😀 Then, let’s dive in!
The name you prefer to be called: Kuudere
Preferred pronouns: They/Them
D/s Relationship status: Under Consideration (Little)
Your website: littleexpectationsblog.wordpress.com
How you identify within BDSM: sadomasochist, rope switch, submissive, little girl
Question #1: I enjoyed reading your latest post/rant about dominants who don’t know what they want in a D/s relationship. What inspired you to write this post? Would you mind sharing that story with us?
Hahaha. Well, I had a Dom who broke my heart and was difficult to deal with up until that day. I figured it’s because he didn’t know how to be a Dom or truly what it meant to be one, the responsibility was tedious for him, and he didn’t appreciate the role (this detail he told me later upon apologizing). Nothing to do with me, so I therapeutically wrote about it. Especially to encourage people to NOT trap themselves with thinking that they need to coax someone to be their dom if that person really doesn’t want that responsibility. To be safest, when in a relationship where power is exchanged, the one in power must know how to lead and give, and the one being led must know how to not be taken advantage of and how to voice oneself. So you can probably expect me to write a post about subs, as well.
Question #2: I noticed that on your Fetlife profile you are into bondage! Would you mind sharing how you came into learning about ropework, bondage, etc.? And what is your favorite aspect about bondage?
Ha. Bondage in a class setting was interesting and sparked my curiosity. I like learning and I like class. I also liked that a class setting wouldn’t make rope inherently sexual, so I figured it was the best environment to do something new and fun, and to start visiting the dungeon. Wanna get in the lifestyle and culture without sexing it up with people? Just take dungeon classes! Someone named @ClaraRosa on Fetlife snatched me up in the Hitchin’ Bitches class held at the dungeon GD2. And from then on, she and her master Cordlord taught me some rope stuff and introduced me to other rope events. I met a whole rope community and I would never have been this far in experimenting with something I consider so artsy and hard without these and other community members. I Iike that bondage has levels. Layers. Tiers. There is quick and easy bondage, long and artsy bondage, and improv bondage where you don’t give a fuck and even can tie stuffies! Bondage lets your imagination run wild without any expectations, as long as you’re having fun. And if you want to set goals and meet someone’s or your expectations, you can go that way, easily, without feeling like you’re alone. There’s a huge community of diverse people with differing uses for rope.
Question #3: What are some other kinks that you wouldn’t mind sharing with us?
Haha. Let’s see. My Fetife kink list is a block that I sometimes don’t update. So if you want a good idea of what else I’m into, I’ll sum it up to receiving: objectification, mind enslavement, humiliation, watersports, anal, double penetration, nipple play, and what I want to do to people: CBT, face-sitting, mind enslavement and humiliation, watersports, and um…I’m interested in receiving/giving pet play as a way of humiliation. And human furniture. I like to be that, sometimes. Finally, worship, especially body worship, is always fun. I’m experimental and so the list is long but here are the main things I adore. Oh. Feederism. I forgot about that. Because I’m a foodie though, not because I want to see me/my partner expand! Wait, did I forget about flogging, whipping, spanking and impact play in general? (I have yet to give that treatment but I LOVE receiving it). I love receiving physical pain and love dishing out emotional humiliation and discomfort. All on a consensual basis of course.
Question #1: I noticed that you play the PS4! What are some of your favorite video games?
Oooh. Some of my old favs are Skyrim and…My new favorites are Dead by Daylight, Monster Hunter, ANY visual novels, and Life Is Strange & its Prequel, especially, and Quantic Dream games like Detroit: Become Human. I love fighting games, and my favorites are Soul Calibur (so far, VI and III), Tekken (so far 6 and 7), and Samurai Showdown (2019), and I have an interest in King of Fighters and Dead or Alive.
Question #2: Have you ever role played on a video game? And if so, which ones?
I have never role played on a video game, surprisingly. I feel while I’m in the game that I am essentially roleplaying by just taking control of the character and feeling their struggle and emotions. And not to mention I am also making their choices for them, when applicable. I have officially been escorted into their world, a new world! That’s roleplay enough for me without having to add my own narrative perspective. I really like the storytelling aspect of videogames. If it makes it any better (sorry, roleplayers), I made a fanfiction. For Skyrim. Of my character. And her companion. So…I roleplayed with the help of the videogame! But I roleplayed outside of the videogame, if that makes sense. 😃
Question #3: Do you feel that D/s relationships can flourish in the online video game setting? Why or why not?
Oh hell yes. Especially if you’re online talking and taking orders from your Dom! To be honest, online games are just another form of social interaction. If you can find your Dom online after a series of dirty jokes and flirtation and serious mental and emotional connection (and that magic ingredient that everyone individually needs, it’s mysterious and different for everyone), then you essentially have done something that would have taken more time and been much harder in the physical public! Flirtations and reaching out and getting to know someone don’t go so well in person when schedules conflict and time playing games with others is had. But if you make yourself available to the person you will grow to love during the times they have lots of free time (such as during social games), then you will learn lots about them in bigger chunks.
You will spend a lot of your time with them during the times that it matters. Blowing off steam. Celebrating DLC and new game releases. Socializing during the winter months. During times of being penny-broke for any outings. Sometimes a monitor allows people to be more vulnerable too, faster, so that’s a plus. I think I’m vouching for the power that online gaming can imbue into a D/s relationship. Just know that the game doesn’t build the relationship. You do. And the person does, too. It’s a 2-way effort that expands far beyond after an online lobby mushed you guys together into a team. You have to embrace that team you created for times outside of the game, too. With the attractive power of love itself, and both partners’ diligence, a D/s relationship can be enhanced by and definitely flourish from an online gaming environment. You help each other during scenes, right? What about during missions? It’s just another way to be there for your partner. Owo
Question #4: What are some nerdy/gamer things you love to do with your dominant or partner?
I like to defend my partner against dinosaurs in Ark: Survival. I heartfeltly imagine the day we will play D&D together in the same campaign. And I like to challenge him in fighting games, share knowledge on the latest console and game info, and love watching him stream video games for me while I fall asleep. Romantic, right?
Question #5: I love your anime avatar! What are some of your favorite anime series? And what manga and anime would you recommend to all of us?
Heh, my anime avatar comes from a series I like that is called, in English, “Heaven’s Lost Property”. I like lots of anime with sexy overtones, like Kakegurui, Prison School, Food Wars, and Shimoneta. I also like heartfelt anime movies like Expelled from Paradise and A Silent Voice. I love but cry at animes like Clannad and Fruits Basket. And I like to hear about animes like Naruto: Shippuden because they are too long.
Question #6: What are some of your favorite online kawaii/gamer stores?
Ah. Online stores? Wow. I like FYE and Anime Zing (if they are still around?) and as for online stores…*crickets* whatever Google brings up when I’m searching the word “kawaii” or its variants. I will buy things from Dreamy Craft Shop, and from kawaii or gamer merch creators from Etsy in general. And my last resort is Amazon. Though I’ve scrolled through the Bioware online shops, their stuff is usually too expensive for me. Great thing is, though, you and I can find cheap and sale items at Hot Topic for many gaming and kawaii merchandise pieces, and that’s what I do a lot, also. Dolls Kill is another kawaii (and other alternative fashions) online store, in general. Wow, that was hard…The internet is saturated with online stores.
Little/ DDlg Questions:
Question #1: How do you identify on the Cg/l spectrum? (Little, Middle, Adult Baby, Babygirl, Princess, Brat, Kitten, etc.)
I’m a babygirl. I…also brat a bit. But I’m easily tameable. Just a bit stubborn. I’m on the little spectrum of 4-5 ish. Not much older than that. Sometimes my ex-Daddy would kid around as if I got older every year and declared I was 6. But, nah, I don’t age! I think of my little self as a mindset or overlay to my adult self. So my little self often bleeds into everyday life activities.
Question #2: What are some of your favorite things to do in Little Space?
I love stickers and chalk and coloring books. And watching movies with my Daddy-to-be and talking his ear off. I am a very anxious and afraid person in general, so I use my little space time to talk about it in a little girl perspective. Which fits because I feel especially vulnerable, then, and his assurance really helps at those times more than ever.
Question #3: How did you come to learn that you enjoy age regression? And how would you describe your Little Space? (kink or non-sexual)
Wow. You may be surprised to know that I thought the idea and role of acting little was cute and adorable and actually made sense for what I liked, but when I YouTubed it I was disgusted. Just because I didn’t like real kid/baby objects. later I learned they were used as a way to roleplay. So I didn’t have to focus on the fact that they were real kid materials. Stores like LittleforBig and Onesies Down Under (that are online) make things exclusively for adults. So…at some point the initial shock drowns in the cuteness and applicability of these child items. Besides, the actual child items are cheaper!
Due to my generally passive nature, I felt being something as submissive and lowly as a little girl fit the imaginary dynamic I wanted to roleplay. Maybe for therapeutic expression purposes. Because, being submissive is not a prime staple of American culture and is looked down upon. The personality trait of being docile and following the lead rather than being a trendsetter is very overlooked, yet it’s a fantasy many of us crave as people. Sometimes we want to support, not take from people. Sometimes we want to be important to somebody, not for what we can tell them to do, but what we can agree with them upon. Being submissive and training for it, and even for being a little, really helps up the amiability and socially likable points. You learn how to serve the community of people around you and not just yourself. Just don’t be a pushover! It is a wonderful lifestyle in a person’s life if they chose it, and it helps encourage you to work on yourself everyday. This is the type of thing that revealed itself to me overtime that helped me understand that age regression was for me and that I liked it.
My age regression can be very unnoticeable at times because for me, being smol is more about how you perceive the world and your Daddy/Mommy rather than how you react. If you look at your Dom/me while in little or middle-space and your perspective is suddenly colored with how great a protector they are and how you cannot wait to please them and be a good girl/boy, you are officially in little space. At least, the little headspace. That’s how I feel. And that’s what my little space is mainly comprised of. This very simple requirement allows me to be in little space without all the extra props of pampers and onesies, and it makes it a lifestyle for me so that even listening to my Daddy in public, letting him explain something or talk for me, or allowing him comfort and guide my person with his large hands while on public transit all show from my heart and willingness what I know him to be.
As for the props I do use when I regress, it is usually a journal, stickers, gel pens, stuffies – always, and sometimes even rope! I’ve tied up a little friend and it felt like I was making them into a pillow fort but without pillows and only rope! And the fort was their body!! And whatever would make a normal adult situation more youthful and innocent, like K-pop idol music, reading a fairytale myself or having one be read to me, or playing a game that makes me feel young, like Slime Rancher or fishing games, usually is what I do in more traditional adult settings. Sometimes I’m covert and sometimes I’m not, because I’m not being kinky by expressing my little side! It just depends on what environment I’m on and how comfortable I feel. Reading, coloring, and using kiddie Camelbak bottles are things I’m comfortable with in public, and I carry my stuffie wherever I go, bagged or not. That’s what it takes for me to satisfy my 24/7 little urges. It’s a safe and tranquil place for me. Ah, and little hairstyles, like Penny Berry’s post pointed out!
My little space transforms to the situation. If I’m in a kinky situation, my little space transforms to make the situation more little spacey. On Fetlife, I tied a friend up with a stuffy, for example. When I’m in class I use kawaii supplies, and when I’m in a D/s scene, I giggle a lot and not get tickled and spanks, and generally dominated, and I am made to beg sometimes, because it really makes me feel smol and submissive to have to beg my Dominant/caregiver for what I want. So, let’s say my little space is adaptive, and I act as smol as I want or don’t want, and for the most part I’m in the mindset and perspective of a little girl or submissive while doing or not doing things that seem little or adult-ish! ‘Tis my little space. I’m legitimately a little space ninja.