Good Evening Friends,
Today was a thoughtful, but happy day. I meandered the stores admiring all of the holiday decorations. I just love seeing the twinkle lights, the festive snacks, and the limited time supplies that come this time of the year. Being immersed in such a warm, uplifting environment gave me time to think and plan out my 2020 writing projects and books to publish. There are so many wonderful and exciting things coming, so stay tuned!
Tonight I’d like to talk about being my most authentic self. The truth is, being “out of the closet” as an adult little isn’t always the easiest thing in the world. I’m thankful that all of YOU are an incredible group of people. You leave warm, inspiring, and uplifting comments. You smash that like button which fuels my fire to keep writing and going. But I’ve had experiences this year that has reminded me of the importance of remaining true to myself in the face of adversity.
I. You Can’t Please Everyone:
Every book that I’ve published on Amazon has felt like giving birth in a way. It all started with the conception of an idea. That turned into pages scribbled in one of my many journals. Then those scribbles turned into more cohesive thoughts in a word document. That word document gets sent to my husband/Daddy for proofreading and editing. Afterwards, it’s time for revision and rewriting sections to make everything flow seamlessly. Finally, after what feels like a climbing a mountain it’s time to head to Amazon to design the cover and fiddle with the technical side of uploading the manuscript. After pouring over that for hours upon hours, I set the price as low as I possibly can to enable everyone to be able to afford a copy of the book. (I have never written for money. I do it from a place of love and passion. 🙂 ). And then the book goes live 48-72 hours later by the Amazon team. It’s an extensive process, so when I see a review that is less than stellar or it’s something out of my control… everything in my being wants to go to that person to make things better for them.
But I can’t. Unfortunately some things are out of my control.
This year I’ve had to remind myself to be thankful of all the positive, glowing reviews on Amazon for the hard work I’ve completed. I’ve had to remind myself that it’s impossible for anyone to please everyone. While I am tender-hearted, I’m learning to be more understanding that what I put out in the world may not be everyone’s preference, and that’s okay. This world is vast with all kinds of people. Just focus on those who do enjoy what you’re doing and stay in your own lane.
II. What Goes Around, Comes Around:
For the longest time… years, really… I tried to conform to whatever those around me were doing. I felt like I wasn’t good enough, and in conforming to others instead of being true to myself, I wasn’t being my most authentic self. If you were to come to my house today you’d meet a short, curvy, bubbly girl who loves to laugh, chat, and just have a good time. You’d be welcomed in and likely stuffed with home-cooked food and treats over a cup of tea. You’d be waited on hand and foot all while being peppered with questions because, well, I’m a curious kitten who loves learning and meeting new people. 🙂 I type how I speak, which means I throw most grammar rules to the wind, and I don’t apologize for it.
This year I received a comment telling me that I was opinionated and too vocal. I was told that my opinion, as a Little, was not the voice of the DDLG community. To which I replied, “you’re right! I’m not, nor have I ever viewed myself, as the be all end all of the DDLG community”. I’m simply an adult little with lots of creative things to share. I put out positivity and kindness in hopes that it comes back around to me one day. I believe that every person has an “inner child” waiting to be explored if they desire to tap into it. I believe in adding some magic, sparkle, and fun to your day. And if that makes me weird… well… I guess I’m uniquely different! 🙂 But at the end of the day, I’m just me. ❤
III. The Tale of Two Brats:
The last thing that I want to share is evolving as a person. This year I was criticized for a piece of writing that I made very early in my submissive journey. The comment made me smile to myself. Why? Because everyone is evolving all the time. How you feel today won’t be how you feel one year from now. We grow, change, and shape our ideas through experience and reflection. So, too, does our writing evolve with us as we grow and change. Hence why I try to publish books as I grow and learn as a submissive and Little. The journey to learning to being the best sub is never complete. There is always something to learn.
One viewpoint that has shifted with me from the first book that I published ages ago to today has been the topic of bratting. When I first began blogging I held the belief that bratting was simply wrong. It was unacceptable and should be discouraged, because your dominant wants you to obey and follow their guidance. I held the belief that all D/s relationships are rooted in respect, obedience, loyalty, and love, and therefore the very idea of acting out (negatively) to get a rise out of your dominant is not something that a submissive should try and do.
But then I met people who incorporate bratting into their relationships in a healthy way. These wonderful people challenged my thinking to show me that bratting, when agreed upon mutually and only done from a place of love and enticement, can actually enhance a D/s relationship. They taught me that they can “brat” their dominant for the purpose of being playful, fun, and downright frisky… and their dominant enjoys it! I learned, and I evolved. I even wrote a piece about the experience. It was one of my favorite moments here on the blog this year. 🙂
So, my dear friends, life is a story. An ever-changing, ever-flowing story. It is a journey where it’s okay to change and adapt. You won’t please everyone, but you don’t have to. Simply be yourself. Spread kindness. And the rest will take care of itself. Have a wonderful night everyone, and I will see you back here in the morning!