Good Morning Friends!
Happy May to you! Today we are kicking off a new series focusing on all of the Littles out there who defy the societal norms of what “girly” is supposed to look like. Throughout this series I hope to show you that there is no right way for a Little to look or be. It is my deepest wish that you find inspiration in new places, and bask in the beauty of who you are.
I am a kid born in the 1980’s. As such, I have fond memories of being a teenager when the Spice Girls were at the height of their game. Back in 2000 I stood in my bedroom as a feisty teenager surrounded by posters of The Backstreet Boys and NSYNC. I wanted to a part of the Spice Girls. No, correction. I wanted to be sporty spice! Out of all of the Spice Girls who had strong feminine looks, Mel C was a bit different. She made Adidas pants and a crop top look sexy! Her toned biceps made me bubble with jealousy. She was fierce and to me that was hot! Then, shortly thereafter the movie, “Bend It Like Beckham” came out in theaters. Keira Knightley played a character who was in love with soccer (football for all my UK/AU buddies 😉 ).
Again, I saw this girl who was about my age. Her hair was short but still cute. Her body was fit and toned. She was reflecting a beautiful blend of masculine and feminine energy… and I was hooked. I remember thinking, “that’s what I want to look like!”. So, I begged my parents for Adidas clothing. I wore track suits to school, and yes, I tried to get away with wearing crop tops (lol). I began to find my most authentic self in embracing who I was as a tomboy and that has carried with me throughout adulthood. Today we’re going to focus on how you can support your Little if they are a tomboy too! Are you ready? Then, let’s dive in! ❤
I. What Does “Girly” Even Mean?
We’ve all heard that line said before: “you play like a girl!” or “you can’t do that… you’re a girl”. But what does that mean anyway? Since the beginning of mankind there has been a blossoming set of standards of what a man should look like, and what a woman should look like. These are more pronounced in conservative areas of the world, but the concept is the same. Women and girls are supposed to act, think, and look a certain way. But today I’d like to challenge that notion. Is expecting girls to act “girly” limiting? I would argue that YES! it is quite limiting.
In the world of Cg/l this has also become a bit of a problem. Littles are seen as girls who embrace all things pink and kawaii. They wear pigtails and have adorable knee high socks complete with a bow. Their behavior is more timid and submissive by nature. But is that really what a Little is supposed to look like? Is that truly what any Little needs to be? Absolutely not. In truth, being a Little is who you are, not how you act, look, or dress. It’s a state of mind. If you are a dominant who is seeking out a submissive who has girly qualities, I encourage you to put out that expectation from the beginning of your connections. Your potential submissives need to know that having a girly submissive is important to you, and there’s nothing wrong with that. But there’s also nothing wrong with being a submissive who doesn’t want to be defined as girly too! I firmly believe that us, non-girly littles, will naturally attract dominants who are more open and accepting of tomboy littles because we remain true to our authentic selves.
II. Women Who Defy the Feminine Mold:
As I grew into an adult I was faced with the hurtles that most other women encounter. Suddenly we’re expected to “grow up” and carry a purse. But if I’m being honest, I hate carrying a purse! Sure, they’re cute to look at. But why do I want to lug around a bag with just a few items in it? No, give me a backpack anyday. And why, oh why, do I need to wear lingerie that is overpriced and cute when it’s just going to end up on the floor in 10 seconds? Yes, as I moved through my 20’s and into my 30’s, I found myself still clinging to my tomboy roots. I came into my own as my own blend of masculine and feminine qualities, and I looked to other women who were doing the same.
Ruby Rose is one of my favorite actresses out there. She’s fierce, sexy, and classy. Hailing from Australia she is a model, but is most famous for her role in “Orange is the New Black”.
Kristen Stewart is another actress who we all probably know from the “Twilight” movie series. She plays Bella, the main female character, and at the time was dating Rob Pattinson (the vampire) in real life. However, post-break up I think Kristen worked even harder to play roles in other movies that defied the “good girl” image that her character Bella had in Twilight. She is unapologetically herself and I’ve watched her come out as “gender fluid” to the mainstream press, smashing Hollywood expectations of her.
Love her or hate her, no one can say that Miley Cyrus hasn’t become her own person. After having lived as “Hannah Montana” for nearly 10 years under the Disney brand, Miley ventured out into the world exploring and experimenting with her look and identity to the fullest. Though she is controversial in the eyes of many, I have to tip my hat to her as a woman who gave the middle finger to anyone who hated on her for her look or behavior. Despite her loud demeanor, you can see the gentle, loving person that she is underneath and that resonates through all of the good works that she does for people in need.
III. Fashion Companies Who Embrace Tomboys:
So, there you are with your submissive and partner. They are uniquely them and all of a sudden they tell you that they don’t want to wear onesies. They have no desire to put a pacifier in their mouth. They don’t want to do baby talk, and they will throw a plushie lest you put something frilly on their body! 😉 What do you do? The answer is: turn to companies who support non-girly littles. Out there are plenty of fashion brands aimed at being more gender neutral, and unisex. Here are some of my favorite brands that I recommend for non-girly Littles:
- FLAVNT Streetwear
- Muttonhead Apparel
- Gender Free World
- Androgynous Fox
- Lonely Kids Club
IV. Supporting Your Little’s Masculine and Feminine Energy:
Here we are at the last section of this post. I’d like to wrap things up in a creative way because… why not? 🙂 That said, let’s finish this off! ❤
Who you are is awesome.
Be bold. Be brave. Be yourself.
Labels can kiss your butt! Be you!
Self-isolation is the perfect time to experiment with your look.
Shave your head if it feels right.
Let your dominant see who you really are inside.
Tackle each day like a badass!
Go to bed with no regrets.
You’re sexy just the way you are.
Hairy legs doesn’t make you less feminine.
Body hair doesn’t mean you stink.
Dance around your home like no one’s watching.
Be silly in a Zoom call to your friends, partner, and loved ones.
Get that tattoo you’ve always wanted.
Support your Little being a badass. It will make them happier.
Forge your own look as an adult Little.
Tell the haters to suck an egg because their opinion doesn’t matter. 😉
Alright my friends, that’s it from me for this post. I hope you all enjoyed it. If you did, hit that like button and let me know. Smash that follow button if you’re new around here, and I will see you back here for the next topic!